What else is coming in November?

So thats whats going on in films, but how about the video games? Well...

Studio: Treyarch
Preceded by: Modern Warfare 2 (or World at War for the Purists)
Genre: First Person Action Shooter
Release Date: 9th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Well you see, rather than thinking this was something else, I just misread the title, you see I thought it was Black Opps. So I thought this was just a press release addressing the fact that while there was cultural diversity in the American team for Modern Warfare, they were now apologising for the fact that they were in no other team and that no other races were present.
What is it really about:
Call of Duty: Black Ops takes place during the Cold War. The player mainly controls two characters: Alex Mason and Jason Hudson who are Studies and Observations Group operatives on missions behind enemy lines, in locations such as the Ural Mountains, Laos, Cuba, and Vietnam.
Why will it be good:
Call of Duty as a series has never been much more than random encounters in different locations and a focus on multiplayer, but it does it so well what more could you ask for? Hell when we're bored my brother and I will even pull out MW2 and just shoot each other, no co-op, just shooting one another. Thats how well these games do this job This will get hours of play over X-box live and Playstation Network.

Why will it suck:
There is a problem with this idea though, the game hasn't been made by Infinity Ward... so whether these new jokers can transfer across the fun and excitment that was captured in the Modern Warfare games, or whether this will be another World at War, remains to be seen.The other thing that pisses me off about this is simple... It's set in the goddamn cold war again! I spoke on this in my Salt Review, the Cold war is fast becoming a tired and overused Trope that holds no true fright or scare for your target audience any more because they didn't have to live through it. Yes I'm sure for people who hid in their basements for days on end during the Cuban missile crisis would find this subject material tense and interesting, but for someone who was a glint in the eye when the Berlin wall was coming down, I don't find this the least bit compelling.
Anticipation:

Studio:Team Sonic
Preceded by: Every god damn shitty new Sonic game that diverts from the old formula
Genre: Fantasy adventure (sports?) game
Release Date: 18th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Sonic is transported back to the 1700s and must teach the people he meets about racial tolerance. The final scene has him running rings around a giant KK Klansman and eventually using the power of love to destroy it.(By the way I promise this is the last race joke for a while)
What is it really about:
After apparently developing a sense of remorse for his past indiscretions, Dr. Eggman supposedly turns a new leaf and builds an intergalactic amusement park up in space, made up of several planet sized attractions. However, the true purpose of this amusement park is to capture the alien inhabitants of these planets, known as Wisps, and harness their colored energy for his nefarious plans. A Wisp named Yacker informs Sonic who, accompanied by Tails, embarks on a journey to Dr. Eggman's amusement park to free the imprisoned Wisps inhabiting each planet and thwart Dr. Eggman's plans.
Why will it be good:
 Umm... aaahhh... It will have some of the old fashioned running aspects?
Why will it suck:
Okay this one is a lot easier. The sonic franchise as a whole has never particularly interested me, the originals games with their running jumpy fun was supposed to be a more ramped up and extreme version of the classic Mario run across screen bit, but it still felt like something that I would pick up and rush through once and then never replay. considering you could finish these games in an hour this wasn't a good thing. But I guess I can't hang my hat on that I mean the gameplay also includes these whisp powers that unlock new areas and wi... Hang on isn't this just an attempt to slow us down and detract from the boredom of running fast repetitively. While this is admirable they seem to have forgotten the reason anyone liked/played your series was because it was just fast running, so stopping and slowing  down will probably only aggravate people.
Anticipation:

Studio: Microsoft Studios
Preceded by: Dignity (But they gave that up to make this)
Genre: "Casual Gaming"
Release Date: 18th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Selling as many of these damn little motion sensors so that Microsoft might steal some of  Nintendo's market.
What is it really about:
Creating a new and innovative game experience through the use of a controller less system in order to .... sell as many of these damn little motion sensors so that Microsoft might steal some of  Nintendo's market (huh what do you know I got it right)
Why will it be good:
As much as I think moving into this area is selling out the games for gamers ideals that Microsoft started with, I have to admit that this concept does make me think we are getting closer to that dystopia future everyone is always making films about (finally). So basically I think it is the good thing that this is a valiant step towards the machine apocalypse.
Why will it suck:
Sellout Sellout SELLOUT!!!! Seriously I get that Microsoft and Sony lose thousands of dollars in console sales every year through the Nintendo wrist exerciser, but I would have thought the the dedicated fans who buy pretty much every game that comes out was better than having a lot of fickle fans who only buy from you every couple of months? The other reason this may suck, and I'm only saying this as a possibly rather than a definite, is that the device may not be as solid as thy say it is, I mean at the moment the Nintendo waggle stick is the best motion device and in all honesty it isn't nearly as responsive as it needs to be for any sort of serious gameplay.
Anticipation:

Studio: Ubisoft
Preceded by: Assassin's Creed 2
Genre: Stealth Action Adventure
Release Date: 18th of November 2010
What did I think it was about:
Purely a Multiplayer port for AC2
What is it really about:
Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood will keep its sandbox style gameplay in an open world of Italy. Like the previous installments, the gameplay's core mechanics are based on parkour movements, crowd-blending stealth, assassinations and melee fighting system. However for the first time in the series, the game offers a multiplayer mode alongside 15 hours of singleplayer campaign
Why will it be good:
For those who don't know, I have University exams up until the 18th of November. On the 18th of November I plan to do 2 things following the end of my exam. 1. Go out and buy Force Unleashed 2. 2. Go out and by Brotherhood.  This game looks seriously kick ass. While Ubisoft maintain this is a separate entry to the Creed series rather than the third in the trilogy, and while it is the continuation of Ezio story there are also parts of Desmond for people, like me, who enjoy his story. As well as that this is the first AC game to feature a Multiplayer where you run around assassinating each other... Thats... Freaking... AWESOME! And finally it has all the usual running and jumping that is a staple of this superb series.
Why will it suck:
If I wake up and this is all a dream
Anticipation:

Dear Hollywood ..... WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You know its a funny thing, over the many months that I've had this blog and bitched and moaned about people who make the things I like I've never taken a crack at Uwe Boll. It's surprising really because most people call him a cinematic Hitler and you'd think he'd be one of the first people whoes nuts I'd want to stick in a blender and then force feed him the result. I guess its mostly because he has lacked the wide enough reach to get himself onto an Australian screen and I can't be assed to go and find a dvd of his films. Bot now there has been some brief information released that has pushed my annoyance meter into high gear.

So here's what I found out (Presented with a STOP at each point I had to stop reading for fear of self harm):

Poster:

STOP

Uwe Boll's next film will be called Blubberella

STOP

It's about an Obese superheroine who "will kick major ass - with her major ass."

STOP

So thats where my first source of information ran out and I managed to put down the kitchen knife before I did something rash. But then, because I'm a sucker for torture, I went and had a look on line and found this quote from Boll:

"The cast includes Michael Paré, Clint Howard, Steggan Mennekes and me…I play Hitler"

...

...

...

I just want to repeat that for everyone. Uwe Boll is going to play the role of Adolf 'Friggin' Hitler in his next movie, which by extention means that Adolf ' Genocidal Maniac' Hitler will be in Uwe 'As if this guy has any sense of subtlty and respect when dealing with a topic like this' Boll's next film.

SLITS WRISTS

So in summary, this will suck and I'm not actually the Gentleman but his first clone Gentleman 2, but please just call me Gentleman, it'll be easier that way.

The Death of The Doctor

 

Okay, I will not be able to get to reviewing The Death Of the doctor for at least 2 weeks... but to tide you over let me give you my first thoughts and that pic above:

"Damn you Davis, where do you get off taking something bad and making it good?"

The Knife: Et tu Lucas?

This is more of an audio rant, so only one pic today everyone.

Whats to come in November.

So I was flicking through the paper the other day and I saw that the list of must see films of the next month and I thought to my self that they were sort of lack-luster and have now put it upon myself to talk about the things coming out this November... So lets begin.

So lets begin with films:

 

Director:  Tom McGrath

Starring:  Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Jonah Hill, David Cross, Brad Pitt

Genre:      Animated Comedic Romantic Actionic Super Hero Movie

First Release Date: 5th of November 2010

What did I think it was about (This is what I thought the movie was about when I first saw the title):

This is the tale of a scientist playing with the forces of Nature in order to expand his own mind, and one day he does so... Literally, now with his head threatening to push the earth out of its orbit the scientist must go on a journey of self discovery before eventually realising that the only way to save the earth is to kill himself... This would be a touching piece.

 What is it really about:

Megamind (Will Ferrell) and his life-long archenemy Metro Man (Brad Pitt) are aliens that were sent away from their respective home planets in time of crisis (much like Superman's origin story), with Metro Man ending up a popular celebrity and Megamind becoming a belittled outcast due to his unintentionally disastrous intellect. Megamind, taking the role of super villain, tries to conquer Metro City in every imaginable way, each attempt a colossal failure thanks to Metro Man, who becomes known as the city's hero. It seems that the pattern will never cease until Megamind seemingly defeats Metro Man during one of his many botched hostage plots involving news reporter Roxanne Ritchi (Tina Fey). Now freed from his rival's shadow, Megamind proceeds to take control of Metro City. Over time, Megamind comes to the realization that he no longer has any purpose in life without an enemy. To appease his depression, he turns Roxanne's lonely cameraman Hal (Jonah Hill) into Metro City's next big superhero, the fiery-headed Titan. Unfortunately for Megamind, Titan decides to utilize his new power against humanity as revenge for the lifetime of rejection he has endured. When Metro Man is discovered alive by Megamind and Roxanne, but uninterested in resuming his superhero duties, Megamind is forced to do the inevitable: become the hero of the crisis. Aided by his childhood, fish-like sidekick Minion (David Cross), Megamind now sets out to stop Titan's rampage of destruction, thus beginning a path to redemption. 

Why will it be good: 

Well just based on the premise I wanted to see this film, it seemed to take the ideas presented in something like Dr Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, and add kid friendly slap-stick. The other thing that turns me onto this film is the cast. Will Farrel is always enjoyable, the little I've seen of Tina Fey has always been solid, and it has my favourite mainstream "hot" actor Brad Pitt in it. 

Why will it suck:

The Main problem that can come out of movies like this is that they sometimes run out of comedy ideas into the third act and just try to skate around it by having a message and a large fight scene. Seeing something like this would detract from the comedy that I've seen from the trailers and the leaked clips 

Anticipation:

 

Director: Danny Boyle

Starring: James Franco

Genre: According to Boyle this will be "An action movie about a guy who can't move", but it looks to be more of a dramatic thriller.

First Release Date: 5th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:

I thought this was the first release of a Japanese torture film. The entire film would run for 127 Hours and would only show the Hello Kitty face slowly making a rotation around the screen, making one full revolution every hour. The background music is this annoying Jpop song

What is it really about:

Hiker Aron Ralston (James Franco) is trapped in an isolated canyon after a fallen boulder crushes his arm while he is hiking in Utah. Over the next five days, Ralston examines his life and survives the elements before amputating his own arm to free himself from the boulder. Ralston then scales a 65 foot wall and hikes over eight miles before he is finally rescued

Why it will be good:

Okay I'm not a Boyle fan and I haven't seen anything that this man has done, but from what trusted sources tell me... Boyle is a dramatic genius, with such classics as Slumdog Millionaire and Trainspotting the man has a Midas touch, so just going off what people have told me. This film should be good.

Why it will suck:

Two reasons: 1. There is over an hour in this film without speech ... No matter how good you are as a director you'd need to be on your absolute a game to make a section like this interesting, and it has a high chance of failure. 2. The entire plot is pretty well contained in that summery I gave above, aside from him thinking about some of the people he has met, the whole film is not much more than that, so once again the thing I worry about is whether it would keep my interest.

Anticipation:

Director: Brothers Strause

Starring: Eric Balfour,Scottie Thompson,Donald Faison

Genre: Science Fiction Thriller

First release date: 12th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:

This movie was a comedy about a struggling architect who finds the plans for a building that will quite literally touch the sky. However once his new building is created the touch releases the 'sky demons' from their slumber and they begin attacking colonies on the earth. Outcast from his own people the architect and his zany assistant set out to hunt down the real architect and work out how to save the earth.

What is it really about:

After a night of partying, a group of friends are distracted when beams of light awaken everyone in Los Angeles, that then attracts every person like a moth to a flame. As the night progresses, they soon discover that once addicted to the light they vanish into thin air, as well as extraterrestrial forces that later threaten to swallow the entire human race.

Why it will be good:

The history of these medium budget has been pretty good, as long as the central idea is solid then they should be okay. Also the guys who are directing and producing this film are supposed to be technical wizards, so the effects for the people being sucked up into the sky should look pretty spectacular.

Why it will suck:

I'm sorry but that story sounds so bad, people get sucked up into the sky on mass, light moths to a light, and there are aliens running around.. It doesn't exactly sound brilliant, but then again it could be the brilliant directing that brings us around. So what else have these brothers directed? Aliens versus Predators: Requiem... Do I have to explain why this is a bad thing?

Anticipation:

Director: David Yates

Starring: The same group of talented British actors that they always get, plus Rhys Ifans this time

Genre: Fantasy Classic

First release date: 18th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:

Well I would try and make a Joke, but come on it's Harry Potter everyone knows what its about. So instead I'll just go with this SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE!! 

What is it really about:

Voldemort's power is growing stronger. He now has control over the Ministry of Magic and Hogwarts. Harry, Ron, and Hermione decide to finish Dumbledore's work and find the rest of the Horcruxes to defeat the Dark Lord. But little hope remains for the Trio, and the rest of the Wizarding World, so everything they do must go as planned.

Why it will be good:

Once again I'll point out that I didn't see the last film so this is just my gut reaction going on the advertising, but from seeing the rest of the series and the trailers, it seems as though the one thing that was always holding back the series has gone. This movie is not set in Hogwarts. Hallelujah!! As amazing as it was in the first film to see the whole thing brought to life, I honestly felt that it began to wear on me the endless amounts of discussions in the corridors, up the stars and in the yard. It was like their voices were equipped with cheese graters. So seeing that this would be a bit moire like an action movie is a welcome addition as far as I'm concerned. And it does bring me to something I've always wanted to see. A detective / bounty hunter movie based in the Harry Potter verse... Think about it.

Why it will suck:
Once again these films have a terrible habit to conform to a set formula... and the formula sucks. You know the one,  Harry whines, Ron does bad comic relief stuff, Hermione is uptight and bitchy, the supporting cast pops in, we say some spells, Voldermort pops up and then insert the book exclusive stuff here. For the most recent 2 films also add sexual teenage angst in there too.

Anticipation:

Director(s): Nathan Greno & Byron Howard

Starring: Mandy Moore, Zachary Levi, Donna Murphy

Genre: Animated Romantic Adventure

First release date: 24th of November 2010

What did I think it was about:
The story of a manic-depressive OCD sufferer who is locked in a tangled headphone speaker factory and told he will be killed if he hasn't escaped the facility by the morning. The story focuses on his mental battle as he attempts to find a way to make it out and avoid the little Id in his head.

What is it really about:
Princess Rapunzel was born with magical hair that restores youth. While she was still a baby, a woman named Mother Gothel kidnapped her to take the youth-restoring power for herself. Rapunzel grew up locked in a tower, taught by Mother Gothel that the world is a horrible place, and not being told that she is a princess. Every year on Rapunzel's birthday, the kingdom has a festival of lights to remember their lost princess by. Rapunzel sees the lights from her window and longs to visit the kingdom. One day, a thief named Flynn Rider breaks into her tower. Rapunzel takes his satchel containing the stolen crown jewels. She promises to return it if he will help her out of the tower and take her to the light festival, and Flynn agrees. Later, Rapunzel realizes that she has fallen in love with him.

Why it will be good:
This film will be done in the classic  Disney animation, with the classic Disney animation music and will be the 50th Disney movie done in this way. In general the Disney writing and characterisation is always good.

Why it will suck:
The story has to do with Rapunzel's magic hair... MAGIC HAIR! Dear god what kind of story can you tell with magic hair. The plot of this thing seems so fomulaic and as the obvious Disney story line. That everyone sings songs and smiles and the two main characters fall in love. As well as that, you know in action films when the main burly testosterone hero has a side kick, they will be female with the kind of body that puts a Barbie doll to shame, the same sort of thing is being done with the male lead, he is there purely to bring in the young boys who have no interest in princesses. The problem with this? This leaves us with a character who is, rather than being developed and interesting, a stereotype that won't really develop.

Anticipation:

 





 So that's my Films for November, stay tuned for my Video Games list.

A Video Addressed to the Desk of Mr Russell T. Davies

Force Unleashed 2 Trailer #2

Oh my god how cool does this look? It is amazing! After years of watching dodgy Star Wars prequels I now know what it was all for ... THIS!

Let me explain that above Geekqueal (Geek Squeal), this trailer brings together a lot of different elements from the prequels and uses them at the full state they needed. The cloning is obviously the major indicator, but there are others there too, the savage separatist state where he meets the God Rankor, Degobah and others. But it is the cloning that is my major focus. It was stated at the start of the second prequel that they couldn't clone Jedi... it is this small nugget of information that holds this story together, so are they still not able to and Starkiller came back another way? Or have they got it but it isn't woking to perfection yet?


All I know is that I am looking forward to this and my exams can't finish soon enough so I can play it.

The New Transformers 3 Title Rant

Dear God... This is going to hurt.

The Knife: The Bay Effect

Today I sit down to study the Bay effect:

Slow slink back

Why hello!

So as some of you may know I have recently decided that I will be beginning a quest for world domination, so as part of this I have spent the last 2 weeks in the Himalayas with a mad soviet scientist learning the ways of the sickle. So what am I going to do as my come back, why tear into a Doctor Who spin off of course!



So this is the episode called "The Death of the Doctor" which will be the third episode screened of the new Sarah Jane Adventures Series. In theory there is nothing wrong with this episode... okay in  theory there is alot wrong with this show, but lets start with the good things:
1. It has the eleventh Doctor in it. I can't expand on that till I see some footage of him but anything with the Doctor is always an up for me.
2. It has two companions and from the clip I am looking forward to it. The interaction between Sarah and Jo is reminding me a lot of the School episode of DW series 2 how the companions share their experience and an appreciation of what spending time with the Doctor can mean.

But there are also 3 problems evident:
1. There are the kids in it. For every Doctor loving ex-companion conversation this episode will have it will have equal or even out-weighted amounts of 'kiddy' dialogue I know this come with the territory of a kids show label but that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it.
2. The Villains... Oh the villains, they look like Jim Henson rejects, and they aren't scary in the slightest, I payed the last Doctor episode because it had him up against the last of the trickster bragade and I really would liked to have seen a full episode with 'The Trickster' but these guys don't seem to be scary at all, it is almost asthough a real hack with an axe to grind has come back to write...
3. Which effortlessly streamlines me into my next point the episode is written by Russell T. Davis. I am not going into this you all know what I think of him and thus you can work it out on your own why this is bad.

So yes to recap, I am now going on to take over the world and this episode will be good if you intermittently black out when the ex-companions and the Doctor is on screen.